Further to contextualizing place we occasionally use a large, retractable lattice antenna and a cable TV splicebot to acquire conventional mass media signals from above the POWcityblog bunker. We can stomache relatively little of this “programming.” Vile in particular is the comedic type of show which usually consists of ensemble stupidity in which a given character by turns will relentlessly and snarkily correct the others in the midst of some unlikely, foolish, “romantic” misadventure. We hypothesize that the audience has its emptiness filled temporarily less by the unlikely adventure of a dorkish group of work mates, room mates, family cohorts, or lovers as much as by the type of healthy cross connections and stimulating circumstances supported in the lives of the characters.
What the audience yearns for is not vicarious friends and neighbours but psychogeographic reality, exploration. One of the most important questions framed by our operations is why the audience willingly accepts filler, a swindle, a substitute for the spectacle of the city?
To gather extra signals for our investigations we were towing a second antenna array into Humber Bay behind our submarine to better gather electronic emissions from Toroyonto’s 24/7 capitalist/apologist media structure when we encountered a serious environmental problem.
Engineering data from POWcity’s exact replica of a Type XXI U-boat confirmed media reports from early this week: a sewage backup caused by heavy rains defiled Toronto’s most celebrated bathing area. While traversing Humber Bay something caused our No. 2 engine cooling water intake to become befouled and we had to surface after dark in the centre of Humber Bay lest that engine overheat. Not a common sight in the bay, a man o’ war like ours, but nobody seemed to notice our sleek and deadly silhouette gently surfacing in the dark. Luckily for Toronto’s continued participation in the western world’s economy we are not homicidal Islamists and we have screened our interns for such tendencies with extreme care!
We can report to you the befoulment was temporary, both of our historic submersible and our beloved bay. The stench was awful for a time. It reminded us of the unfortunate occasion in 2001 when we ate a large quantity of poutine and then went to a pool party where there was free lager. Two or three interns were overcome but all remained at their combat stations.
Humber Bay is large enough for a not-exactly-diminutive Type XXI to do a 360 degree turn at war emergency speed which allowed us to cleanse our intakes. From the road and transit maps commonly used by Toryontonians you would scarcely know Humber Bay existed. It is shown thereon usually as a little lame blue bump below High Park.
Landfill for transportation links and commercial development made Humber Bay smaller but it is still a significant body of water. From direct observation we see it is large enough to contain sunken vessels and be a place of history. In the 1920s obsolete sailing ships were burned as an amusement for crowds and the Americans landed here at the start of the War of 1812. The much shrunken wetlands, cherished by the First Nations and where sweet grass can still be found, support a variety of bird life and hang on with an understated, prehistoric grace.
We thought the city had its sewage issues beat. Perhaps not. Either way “ship’s log” will have the interns chuckling for some time to come.
While waiting for the cover of darkness we spotted this image via periscope.
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